Only 7 school days until half term and a major decision to be made

How slowly is this week going? Everyone is tired and clinging on 'til half term. Most people seem to have coughs and colds so I'm tempted to wear a scarf over my face - so many germs flying around.

My dream job, in my dream school, near my dream village, has been advertised in the TES. I have spent the last two days in tears because I don't know what to do. I desperately want to go back to Devon and I'd love to work in a nice school again, but I have to consider Little E. If I move us both to Devon she won't be able to see her dad once a week and she'll become a motorway kid - spending half her weekends sitting in the M5. Or perhaps she'll only see him during school holidays. We have talked about it but she's not keen on leaving her school and friends. She said she wouldn't mind moving when she's finished Year 6, but the job may never come up again. Mum, Dad, Karen and K H all say it's time I put myself first, but I don't think that's right - I have to put LE first. It's not her fault that her mum and dad are divorced and she's been damaged enough by the whole situation - how can I move her away from the opportunity of seeing her dad once a week?

The trouble is - I'm feeling so resentful that I can't do what I want and it's making me really unhappy. He has done whatever he wants since he left and he's being particularly vile at the moment. Not helped by Bun moving in on him and his family. I just want to run away from them all, but I have never believed running away solved anything.

I am going to apply for the job. If I'm meant to work there, I'll get the job. If I'm not, I won't. Not so sure how I'll deal with my conscience if I get it though.